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Matthew 12:30 – He who is not with Me is against Me; and he who does not gather with Me..  scatters”

Funny how you don’t notice things until it is pointed out.  Once it’s pointed out, you can’t stop seeing it.

I loved books, movies, and especially music.  When I came to the Lord seven years ago, I thought the Lord told me to give them up.

In response, I actually cried out in a fairly loud voice in my room when I was on my knees praying, “Lord, I know you’re telling me to give up books, movies, and music…  BUT I DON’T WANT TO!”

I kid you not, I gasped.

I’m not a yeller by nature.  And I had never yelled at the Lord, ever.  I mean who does that?

So the fact I yelled that out, I gasped in complete surprise.

The next day, I told my best friend and she being the awesome friend she was…  gave up her books and movies too.  I had like hundred of movies on my computer and hard drives I had to delete.  So much music.  And so, so many books.

Once I was obedient, the Lord told me why with the verse above.  Once the verse was pointed out to me, it was like I couldn’t NOT see it…  how everything in my life was anti God.  I mean everything.

A few years later, I heard the testimony of Mr. Schimmel of Good Fight Ministries.  His testimony opened my eyes and ministered to my spirit.  He made a ministry out of pointing out how most of these actors, musicians, etc literally sold their soul to Satan.   They actually admit it!

My goodness!

But there is a second half to this story.  One I am not proud of.

A few years back in 2016, I started backsliding.  I didn’t even want to.  But it was like work got harder and busier.  It should have been a great year.  That was the year the Lord gave us the Library.  But I was getting farther and farther from God.

And one of the first things to creep back in was music.  Then movies.  Then books.

See, once I gave them up for Jesus, I didn’t miss them.  Not even a little bit.  I was so excited to have Jesus, I didn’t even want them.

But the farther I got from Jesus, the more these things crept back in.  And none of those things satisfied.  Despite the fact the entertainment did not satisfy, I still spent my time listening to the music or reading a book, checking out after work.  Rather than spending my time with Him.

I thought, surely it’s not that big of a deal.  I mean I know these things are not glorifying God.  But it’s not affecting me.  It’s not changing how I believe.

But it was affecting me.  I missed God.  He seemed so far away.  When I first came to Jesus, He literally was all I thought about.  I talked to Him all day every day, it seemed.  During the backsliding time though, I was so busy working and worrying and dealing with life I barely thought about Him.  And I missed Him.

It’s a long story, but my point is…  what we fill our minds with does matter.  And everyone out there is either for God…  or against.  NO middle ground.